NOLLYTOONS OR ANIMATED NOLLY OR CARTOONS NOLLY

The first film animation was “Humorous Phases of funny faces” made in 1906 by American J. Stuart Blacton and in 1927, Walt Disney came up with the idea of Mortimer mouse which his wife later convinced him to change to Mickey Mouse. Bill Hanna and Joe Barbera created the classic cartoon most of us grew up watching (Tom & Jerry) in 1939 which was 36 years after the first film animation. These cartoon characters have been a part of our culture from generations to generations and they have become major movie and toy franchise that have generated millions of dollars all over the world enchanting kids from Africa to Asia.

A hundred and two years after the first animated movie was made, the supposed 3rd largest movie industry in the world can not boast of one animated movie. I find this very thwarting as our darling Nollywood boasts of producing 1000 movies annually and not even one is animated, no animated figure or icon has been depicted in any Nollywood movie. The closest thing Nollywood has to this is the papa Ajasco / super story series which is a spin off from the Ikebe super comic strip and this is not even animated. I was hoping that the pan-African football (soccer) project SUPASTRIKAS, an adaptation of the British comic ROY OF THE ROVERS though first published in south Africa would evolve into an animated series that would thrill the young audience but I guess Nollywood producers are more concerned about love stories and tales concerning rituals.

I think our movie industry still has a long way to go; we need to concentrate on the most important thing which is creativity. If the producers really want to make profit, this would be a very great avenue because one can generate a lot of revenue with animated characters from sources like clothing lines, toys, comics, costumes and even theme parks. Walt Disney built an empire with a cartoon character so why can’t we just think outside the box? We truly need a revolution in Nollywood.

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THE NOLLY/GHOLLY EFFECT

Over the past months I have observed the current trend in the Nigerian movies which is the collaboration of both Nigerian and Ghanaian movie stars in the same movie. At first I thought this was a good and welcomed development that will help spread the tentacles of the Nigerian motion picture industry beyond the shores of Nigeria and will help develop the Ghanaian movie industry also know an GHOLLYWOOD but as at now, I think the concept has been overstretched.

The present surge of these movie have ridiculed whatever hopes of development I had in the first place because the producers are churning out these “Nolly-Gholly” fiasco in huge numbers therefore making their main objective quantity instead of quality. These movies are even worse than the usual pathetic Nollywood movies we make because the producers just want to use this as a marketing strategy and nothing else. The storylines are pathetic, the actors are cast wrongly, the screenplay is hogwash and don’t get me started on the title of these movies. With movie titles like Beyonce & Rihanna (watch The Trailer here), how can Nollywood be seen as a force to reckon with in the world? How can the Nigeria-Ghana collaboration be taken seriously? Ghanaians don’t pay tax here, yet they come here in droves, make money and return to their country to live lavishly. The reason marketers use them more now is simply because of greed. They charge less and permit me to say, they don’t act too well. But our marketers will sell their souls to gain extra kobo. Why would they want to use us when we charge them and deliver premium quality when there is someone who will charge less and probably deliver less? They prefer the extra cash to quality. Nigerian movies will sell anywhere, whether it has an all Nigerian cast in it or not. Another dangerous twist to this issue is that marketers are now going as far as Sierra Leone, Liberia and other African countries scouting for artistes that would give their works marketing leverage. And most of the time, marketers hold up production for them and adjust shooting time to fit their schedules.

I have nothing against this allegiance but I think both parties need to go back to their drawing boards and make good movies that are worthy of being called transnational movies because if they continue like this, the movie industry in both countries would have taken one step forward and 2 steps backwards.

Tinapa Movie Studios………Another hoax?

Tinapa Is Located In Calabar State Of Nigeria Where The Famous And Prestigious Obudu Cattle Ranch Resort Is Located

I remember the sanguinity and passion the Donald Duke administration had for Nollywood, I remember when the first major Nollywood Movie Studio project began in Calabar. Everyone was optimistic because they respected what the administration of Cross river state did with Obudu Ranch making it the biggest tourist spot in Nigeria and with this resume, the Cross river government broke boundaries so naturally I was hopeful.

Watch The Press Release And Trailer Of The Tinapa Movie Studio here

Now that Donald Duke’s tenure is over, we have been wondering what happened to the Tinapa Studio Project. Our correspondent was in Calabar recently to do a report on the Tinapa dream and she came back with shocking results. The project has lost its momentum since the new administration has been sworn in. Construction is going on at a snail's pace with little progress and the site was almost deserted as construction workers were no where to be found and there were tall grasses everywhere. We at nollyarns.com are using this medium to appeal to the present Cross river state administration to please put an end to this “abandon project ‘’ debacle that trails most government establishments in Nigeria. If the state government can not come up with enough funds to finish this project, they should seek the help of private investors because our darling Nollywood needs a movie studio. Nollywood producers have been using the “no studio” excuse for years as justification for the garbage they produce; we think it’s high time we separate the chaff from the wheat. Hopefully the Gov. Liyel Imoke administration will do the right thing before Donald’s dream is crushed.

Movie Props & Critics: YANKEE GIRLS AND THE RETURN OF THE YANKEE GIRLS

YANKEE GIRLS AND THE RETURN OF THE YANKEE GIRLS

Starring Omotola Jalade Ekeinde, Rita Dominic, Stella Damascus, Emeka Nwafor, Uche Elendu, Uche Obodo

Director: Moses Ebere Producer: Arinze Egesimba

Like most Nollywood movies these days, you can deduce that “the return” is the part 3 and 4 of the original movie. This movie revolves around the lives of two big girls battling for power and oil contracts. The major stars are Rita Dominic, Omotola Jalade Ekeinde and Stella Damascus. Stella however, was not brought into play until The Return Of The Yankee Girls.

See The Trailer here

Being a girl who absolutely loves glamour, one reason I was interested in the movie was because I expected to see the best of the best in fashion, and I was not disappointed. Again like all Nollywood films, the actresses tried to do outdo themselves and with the likes of Rita and Omotola, there was a lot of fashion, glitz and glamour as expected. This however, is the only reason I would advice any one to see this movie as the rest of it was sham. For the guys, you might be interested in the fleet of cars that were put on display, although personally I think you should be used to them cars by now. You might also just enjoy the sights of beautiful women on display and one scene you should especially watch out for is that of Omotola breaking a Hummer windshield with an axe and in the shortest of shorts. I must say Omotola really is looking fit now and is utterly sexy.

Back to the movie; Why 3 beautiful actresses would come together in a film as stupid and as disjointed as Yankee Gals is lost on me. The title is, as we used to say back in the day, “O.P” as in off point. The only thing Yankee about the movie were the dejected white people in it, of which one of them am sure is Lebanese and I could hardly make out what he was saying. Don’t get me wrong, there was a story, the Director was just too *%&$#$ (lack of words to use) to put the scenes together. The movie is a drag; it takes up about 3 hours of pointless time. The Yankee girls were basically the introduction that managed to contain 2 discs. Nollywood, a word of advice, you can have parts but at least have enough sensible stories to make up for your parts and sequels. Maybe the strategy was to make the film so disjointed, that you would only have to watch it to understand because no one can relate the story.

Every single scene had a problem. First, what was with the meaningless and totally impossible show of power by having road blocks on the busy streets of Lagos and shootings that were uncalled for? Anyway maybe anything is possible in Lagos. Most importantly, Nollywood movies should NOT, under any circumstance, involve SHOOTINGS, not yet, maybe never. There were a few laughs; a scene involving “supposed” seductive dancing, a Cuban cigar that was held (and put in mouth) but never lit, then the “mean looking man” that appears and disappears in the black suit? Exactly what was his purpose again? To shoot at a woman that every one knew could not be shot at? Oh and if you want to shop privately in a boutique, call the manager before you get there and save yourself and others the embarrassment. Even dumb and richer Paris Hilton has enough sense to do that.

The big question, should you see this movie? Generally and personally a big capital N-O. But if you are feeling too rich with yourself, then hey, knock yourself out. There are a few good things though, for one, there was good acting, of course. There were some funny scenes and lets not forget ladies, FASHION at one of its best.

As far as ratings go, 4 out of 10, 2 for fashion, 1 for acting, ½ for cars and ½ for the storyline which came up to remind you of itself once in a while. This movie was not properly executed. The storyline itself isn’t worth movie recognition. Plus, the directing was totally poor. Hey guess what? There’s more. Watch out for YANKEE BOYS. Lol. No, seriously, Jim Iyke, Ramsey Noah and Emeka Ike.

Post By Onome Umukoro

BILLIONAIRE BAIL-OUT?

A lot of movies in Hollywood bank over $100 million at the box office, in fact in America, a movie is considered a flop if it earns any less. i pondered why even the biggest Nollywood movies can't even boast of N15 million (about $125,000), then it occurred to me that most Hollywood movies are Big Budget movies that are financed by the richest people in America. These filthy rich moguls invest in movie production like they invest in major money making ventures like real estate and oil so why shouldn't the get their money back. One of the most successful producers of all time, Jerry Bruckheimer has been nicknamed "Mr. Blockbuster", due to his track record of commercially successful, high-grossing films like Beverly Hills Cop, Top Gun, The Rock, Con Air, Crimson Tide, Armageddon, Enemy of the State, Gone in Sixty Seconds, Black Hawk Down, Pearl Harbor, Pirates of the Caribbean, King Arthur, and National Treasure.. Overall, his films have brought in over $13 billion to Hollywood, and have launched the careers of numerous actors and directors. I bet it's the huge amount invested that propels the filmmakers to make brilliant and well crafted movies because if the audience don't dig your movie then Shylock will definitely have his pound of flesh. We are the 5th largest oil producing nation and there are people with very deep pockets in Nigeria. Oh! You don't believe me? Check this out

here are the names of Naija's top 10 richest people according to Encomium Magazine.

1. Mike Adenuga - $6billion (Globacom)
2. Aliko Dangote - $4billion (Business man)
3. Femi Otedola - $3.5billion (Business man)
4. Jim Ovia - $2.3billion(CEO Zenith Bank)
5. Cecilia Ibru - $1.2billion (CEO Oceanic Bank)
6. Oba Otudeko - $1billion
7. Rasak Okoya - $300million (Business man - Shade's other half)
8. Sonny Odogwu - $260millin
9. Bode Akindele - $230million (Business man - Tiffany Amber's father)
10. Emmanuel Ojei - $165million

I bet if any of these people can invest in Nollywood, it will keep the director or producer on his toes because he knows he has to make credible movies to make back the capital and profit for the investor. This will definitely stop the entire sub-standard straight to video crap we make in Nigeria. These Moguls can even build cinemas and create proper marketing channels to protect their investment. I know it's not going to be easy with the greedy nature of the movie practitioners but Dangote has major factories all over the country with his own marketing channels. Why didn't he leave the distribution in the hands of "ALABA BOYS"? That's because there's too much money to be made and if this works for spaghetti, think about what he can achieve with Nollywood whose fan base despite the crap they produce is the Largest in Africa. Please guys, save Nollywood and don't let these present producers kill us with crap.

OBAMA IN NOLLYWOOD ?

WITH a historic victory in the polls recently of Barrack Obama to become the first black president in the United States, Nollywood producers are trying desperately to outwit themselves on who comes out with the first Obama home movie.

While the wise ones that have been following the campaign train of the American President-elect are almost through with their scripts and looking for funds, the less creative ones, having woken from their slumber, have been contacting scriptwriters to come out with any script that would showcase the now very popular Obama spirit of I can. What we could not ascertain are the titles of the movies which the producers are keeping a secret as that, they believe, holds the key to making sales.
We are using this medium to appeal to these producers to please spare us this ridicle. we have never produced a decent movie about any of our past leaders or cultural icons (except for few movies like SANGO), why should we embarass ourselves with this cheap publicity stunt.

It is likely that one of the movies will be released before Obama is sworn in as president next year. Imagine a movie shot & produced in less than 3 months. I think you have an idea of what a big disgrace this movie will be. I wonder who they'll hire to play Obama? i guess Saint Obi or Clem Ohameze. Nollyarns will keep you posted.